SESSION TEN: SMALL TALK
The ability to make small talk can help us build business, develop our networking skills, get friends, maintain relationships, and even find us jobs. However, some people look down on small talk, and it can be a difficult skill to master.
In this session, you will learn why small talk is so important. You will also learn some important do’s and don’ts, plus how to close out a conversation. As well, you will have an opportunity to think about situations where you have successfully engaged in small talk and what lessons you can take away from those scenarios.
Small Talk
Small talk has a bad reputation. Sometimes we think of it as the poor cousin to a “real” conversation, and it certain cultures it is not valued at all. However, without small talk, many of us will never get to those “real” conversations. Small talk helps us put others at ease and make them comfortable. Small talk breaks the ice and goes a long way toward furthering a relationship.
What Works?
- As important as what you say is how you say it. Wear a smile. It is always becoming to your voice.
- If you find yourself alone, look for others who look similarly disengaged or join a group with an odd number of people. You could also pass the cheese tray or sample the buffet table.
- One tip that often works is to imagine you are host or hostess. Now you will be less worried about yourself and more concerned about other people.
What Doesn’t Work?
- Don’t attempt to make a derogatory remark under the guise of humor (that’s sarcasm).
- Don’t try to shock. Some people are hard to shock anyway, and others may be shocked in a very negative way, so it just isn’t worth the risk.
- Lengthy emotional debates will not contribute to the gathering. Death, politics, religion, illness, and children usually head the list of subjects to be avoided. There are, of course, exceptions to every rule, such as when you must express your condolences to someone when someone has been ill or have somebody they care for who is ill.
Exit Lines
No matter how seriously you try, not all conversations can be made into engaging discussions. Eventually even good conversations may come to an end. Tell the other person how much you have enjoyed speaking with them and go on to meet other people.