SESSION FOUR: PREVENTING PROBLEMS
We can do a lot to keep problems from happening in the first place! As the old saying goes, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Even better, there are many prevention techniques that are easy to remember and to apply.
In this session, we will talk about how empathizing can help prevent conflict. We will also talk about some common misconceptions that can lead to conflict. Finally, you will be asked to think of some solutions that might work for your particular work and life situations.
The Importance of Empathy
If you develop your empathizing skills, you can put yourself in the other person’s shoes even though you do not have to agree with them. If you are practicing being empathetic (and we recommend that you do) you should avoid phrases like, “I agree” or, “Yes, that’s true.” Don’t reinforce a concern, either. You can simply express your empathy by rephrasing the key topic of the person’s statement.
Some phrases you might use include:
- “I hear…”
- “I understand…”
- “I think you’re saying…”
The concept of rephrasing before answering gives you:
- A chance to empathize with the concerns
- An opportunity to show the person that you understand the concern
- A moment to think of an appropriate response
It’s also important to check to be sure the individual is satisfied with your level of understanding or your explanation. Your ability to empathize will play an important role in your overall communication skills and your ability to foster a positive and productive environment.
Dangerous Misconceptions
Although we believe that we are being clear when we speak, we’re not always being as efficient as we think. Here are some important misconceptions for you to keep in mind when you are having a conversation:
- People always pay attention when you are speaking to them.
- When people say they are paying attention, they really are.
- When someone says “I know” they really do.
- Saying something over and over will ensure that your listener understands.
- Saying something over and over, slowly or loudly, will be even more effective.